Carl phoned me once more. Carl calls me all the time. I hope somebody takes Carl's phone away. He says "Welcome." He says that then he says nothing else. Carl does this a lot.

We-Carl, I, others-live in a small, quaint row of houses. Everyone knows each other and Carl posits this closeness, this fate proximity is reason to take control of telephone lines as if Carl is the most affable Napoleon ever.

So what did he have to tell me today? Excitedly he tells me to come by; he had something very cool to show me. Excuses bounce off Carl like rubber. I went to his house

His yard is as boisterous as Carl. For example: his yard usually features seasonal decorations. It's spring now and so what is on display? A large, inflatable rabbit. Swaying, it welcomes me. Carl pops out his front door before I can knock. He has a cheesy smirk. He takes me by my shoulder towards the front lawn. Carl stares upward. I do too. My mind is the saddest blank canvas and he is the crazed painter. I wait.

"See that?" he asks. No. "I installed a gutter cover." Wow. "It's awesome". That seamless cover prevents leaves and stuff from clogging everything, which limits how often I must clear it." Shockingly, Carl's idea was actually useful.

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